As a doula, it is important your clients feel well supported and comfortable during birth. One of the best ways to facilitate that is to ensure there is no tension in the birthing space. Working as a team with hospital or midwifery staff, rather than approaching it as an us vs them mentality, can help create a positive birth space.
The way you step into that space can set the tone for the rest of the birth experience. Approaching the hospital with a “team mindset” allows you to work in collaboration with nurses, midwives, and doctors.
The last thing a birthing family needs is to feel tension in the space. By entering the birthing space with a team approach, we can often reduce any tension. Perhaps the providers worked with a doula in the past who stepped outside of her scope and thus they’re on edge. By entering with a team approach, you are letting them know you understand you scope and role in the birthing space.
Here are ways you can serve your families and use the team approach:
Remember: You’re Joining an Existing Care Team
When you enter a hospital, you are stepping into a medical team’s established environment. While your role as a doula is unique and non-clinical, you can still position yourself as a collaborator rather than an outsider. This helps reduce tension, fosters mutual respect, and ensures your presence is seen as an asset—not a challenge.
Practical tip: Greet the nurse and any care providers warmly when you arrive. A simple “Hi, I’m [Name], I’m here as [Client’s Name]’s doula, and I’m looking forward to supporting them together to have a safe birth experience,” immediately sets a cooperative tone.
Speak Positively About the Care Team in Front of Your Client
Your client may have worries or fears about the hospital environment, especially if interventions become necessary. By speaking respectfully about the medical staff in their presence, you reassure them that their support team is working together. This helps your client feel safe, supported, and confident in their choices.
Prenatally, I often speak with clients about why providers might be more comfortable with interventions. Whether we like it or not, defensive medicine is part of healthcare. When we help families understand why some procedures might be pushed, they can better communicate with their medical team about what they do and do not want.
Practical tip: If the family has a concern, validate their feelings privately, and help them ask questions or use tools like B.R.A.I.N. to make informed decisions. Avoid undermining the care team, as it can increase anxiety and make collaborative communication harder. Support your families in having open communication with their birth team and helping them feel confident to decline anything they are not comfortable with. You can also communicate with them by asking questions such as, “Can you help us understand why you are recommending X?”
Clarify Roles Without Competition
As a doula, your role is to provide emotional, physical, and informational support—not to replace or challenge medical providers. By keeping this clear in your interactions, you build trust with both the family and the care team.
Practical tip: Use language that highlights your role’s complement to theirs. For example:
- “I’ll help with positioning and comfort measures while you do the monitoring.”
- “They’d like to try breathing techniques before making a decision on pain medication— can you revisit pain medication a bit later?”
Be a Calm, Grounding Presence in the Room
Hospitals can be busy, loud, and fast-paced. You can be the steady, reassuring presence that keeps the mom focused and relaxed. Your calm energy benefits not only the family but also the providers, who often appreciate a peaceful environment during intense moments.
Advocate Through Facilitation, Not Confrontation
Effective advocacy in a hospital setting often looks like facilitating communication rather than speaking over staff. You can encourage the mom and her support people to voice their preferences, remind them of their birth plan, and help interpret medical language without creating an adversarial atmosphere.
Practical tip: Instead of saying, “She doesn’t want that,” try, “Could we have a moment to talk about options before making a decision?” This keeps the dialogue respectful and collaborative.
Express Gratitude Before You Leave
When the birth is over, take a moment to thank the nurse, provider, or staff members who were part of the experience. Gratitude strengthens relationships and could mean doulas are welcomed warmly for future births.
When doulas enter the hospital as part of a team—rather than as an adversary—everyone benefits. The birthing person feels fully supported, the care team sees the doula as an ally, and the overall atmosphere becomes more respectful and harmonious.
A team approach doesn’t mean compromising encouraging advocacy, it means delivering it in a way that opens doors instead of closing them.
Not yet a trained doula ready to work as a team? Register today and begin your doula journey!
Author: Aliza Juliette Bancoff
Aliza Juliette Bancoff is a well-known doula and doula trainer who has been providing doula services to families for over a decade. She is the founder of Main Line Doulas, a doula group providing doula support in the great Philadelphia area for the last decade, the International Doula Institute, which provides online doula training and lactation training and certification programs and the International Breastfeeding Institute which provides lactation training and certification. She is the co-founder of United Birth, a company devoted to increasing access to doulas across the country to make the perinatal time safer both physically and emotionally. “Every birthing person deserves access to quality doula support. And we are working to make that a reality across the country. The work we are doing to get doulas to every birthing person will decrease the black infant and maternal mortality rate significantly by 2030.” Says Bancoff. Aliza is known for her compassionate and empowering approach to doula work, and she has been featured in numerous media outlets, including United Nations Maternal Health Report, Parent Magazine, CafeMom, theBump and many more. Aliza's journey into doula work began when she gave birth to her first child and felt a strong calling...