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When You Become a Doula, You’ll Meet Moms Who “Hate” Postpartum as Much as Adele

May 17, 2018

When You Become a Doula, You’ll Meet Moms Who “Hate” Postpartum as Much as Adele

Adele was very candid about her postpartum depression. The singer’s words mirror what you may hear from new moms when you become a doula.

Adele is known for her honesty. In a recent interview with Vanity Fair, she proved that talking about her postpartum depression is no exception. The first few weeks and months after having a baby are hard. In fact, Adele’s words may become very familiar to you when you become a doula.

Reflecting on the tumultuous time in her life, she recalled finally admitting to a friend “I … hate this”. Her friend, also a new mother, reciprocated her feelings.

When asked about whether or not she would have a second child, she revealed that she is too scared. Her postpartum depression was so bad that she’s frightened to relive it.

“My knowledge of postpartum – or postnatal as we call it in England – is that you don’t want to be with your child; you’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job. But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I’d made the worst decision of my life.”

@vanityfair

A photo posted by @adele on Oct 31, 2016 at 9:33am PDT

When you become a doula, it’s important to know that postpartum depression can take many forms.

As we mentioned in a previous article, it’s not a “one-size-fits-all” disorder. Adele’s words illustrate that fact perfectly.

After you become a doula, it’s important for you to create a safe space for mothers to communicate openly and honestly. As Adele said, she thought postpartum depression presented differently than what she experienced. New mothers may need help sorting out their feelings and understanding what’s normal and what’s not. For instance, they be unsure if their experience baby blues or something else.

For some additional information about recovering from postpartum depression, visit this helpful blog post:

How Long Does Postpartum Depression Last? Accelerate your Recovery!

Most importantly, by opening up about her struggle, Adele is letting other mothers with postpartum depression know that they’re not alone. When you become a doula, you may need to remind your clients of this fact. Encourage them to talk not just to you, but other mothers. Having peer support can be invaluable. Adele said her depression “lifted” after she finally admitted her struggle to her friend.

If you have a heart for working with mothers and are ready to become a doula, contact the International Doula Institute today.

Aliza Juliette Bancoff
Author: Aliza Juliette Bancoff

Aliza Juliette Bancoff is a well-known doula and doula trainer who has been providing doula services to families for over a decade. She is the founder of Main Line Doulas, a doula group providing doula support in the great Philadelphia area for the last decade, the International Doula Institute, which provides online doula training and lactation training and certification programs and  the International Breastfeeding Institute which provides lactation training and certification.   She is the co-founder of United Birth, a company devoted to increasing access to doulas across the country to make the perinatal time safer both physically and emotionally. “Every birthing person deserves access to quality doula support. And we are working to make that a reality across the country. The work we are doing to get doulas to every birthing person will decrease the black infant and maternal mortality rate significantly by 2030.” Says Bancoff. Aliza is known for her compassionate and empowering approach to doula work, and she has been featured in numerous media outlets, including United Nations Maternal Health Report,  Parent Magazine, CafeMom, theBump and many more. Aliza's journey into doula work began when she gave birth to her first child and felt a strong calling...

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